Idiom Crisis Continues

The Onion reports on the ongoing US idiom shortage. Since the report came out, the US Secretary of State has reminded Canada of its obligations under NAFTA to share our natural idiom resources, but the Maritimes and the far north, who have traditionally been the largest suppliers of such locutions, have been reluctant to reduce stocks and are reportedly hoping for higher world commodity prices. "It's not just the English speaking countries," said Wally McGonigle, a spokesman for the guild of PEI idiom producers. "We've got English teachers all over the world banging down the door for this stuff. I'll be damned if we just open up our stocks and let a bunch of easterners get rich selling them to the States."